\u0110\u00eam qua t\u00f4i nh\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c m\u1ed9t email t\u1eeb m\u1ed9t h\u1ecdc sinh: \u201cB\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em \u00e9p em h\u1ecdc c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 m\u00e0 em kh\u00f4ng th\u00edch. H\u1ecd mu\u1ed1n em h\u1ecdc Y hay K\u0129 ngh\u1ec7. B\u1ea5t k\u00ec c\u00e1i g\u00ec kh\u00e1c \u0111\u1ec1u KH\u00d4NG \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ch\u1ea5p nh\u1eadn. B\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em ngh\u0129 n\u1ebfu em KH\u00d4NG l\u00e0 b\u00e1c s\u0129 hay k\u0129 s\u01b0, th\u00ec em l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 th\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i cho gia \u0111\u00ecnh em. Em kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0m g\u00ec. Xin th\u1ea7y gi\u00fap \u0111\u1ee1.\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u0110\u00e1p: B\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em mu\u1ed1n \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t nh\u1ea5t cho em nh\u01b0ng h\u1ecd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 tri th\u1ee9c th\u1ea5u \u0111\u00e1o v\u1ec1 th\u1ecb tr\u01b0\u1eddng to\u00e0n c\u1ea7u cho n\u00ean h\u1ecd ngh\u0129 r\u1eb1ng Y v\u00e0 K\u0129 ngh\u1ec7 l\u00e0 nh\u1eefng ch\u1ecdn l\u1ef1a duy nh\u1ea5t. T\u1ea5t nhi\u00ean, c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u ch\u1ecdn l\u1ef1a kh\u00e1c n\u1eefa nh\u01b0ng th\u1ea7y kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft em th\u00edch c\u00e1i g\u00ec hay em mu\u1ed1n h\u1ecdc c\u00e1i g\u00ec? T\u1ed1t nh\u1ea5t l\u00e0 th\u1ea3o lu\u1eadn c\u1edfi m\u1edf c\u00e1c tu\u1ef3 ch\u1ecdn kh\u00e1c v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em theo c\u00e1ch b\u00ecnh t\u0129nh kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb x\u00fac \u0111\u1ed9ng.<\/p>\n
T\u1eeb c\u00e1ch nh\u00ecn c\u1ee7a b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em, h\u1ecd tin r\u1eb1ng em c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 c\u00f3 ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p t\u1ed1t v\u00e0 s\u1ed1ng t\u1ed1t trong nh\u1eefng v\u1ecb tr\u00ed n\u00e0y (t\u1ee9c l\u00e0 b\u00e1c s\u0129 hay k\u0129 s\u01b0) nh\u01b0ng h\u1ecd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft li\u1ec7u em c\u00f3 ti\u1ec1m n\u0103ng \u0111\u1ec3 th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng trong c\u00e1c l\u0129nh v\u1ef1c n\u00e0y hay kh\u00f4ng. T\u00f4i bi\u1ebft r\u1eb1ng c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u h\u1ecdc sinh kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u00e1p \u1ee9ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c m\u1ee5c \u0111\u00edch c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd v\u00e0 l\u00e0m th\u1ea5t v\u1ecdng gia \u0111\u00ecnh h\u1ecd v\u00ec h\u1ecd kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 ho\u00e0n th\u00e0nh \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c gi\u00e1o d\u1ee5c c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd trong nh\u1eefng l\u0129nh v\u1ef1c m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 ch\u1ecdn l\u1ef1a c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd. T\u00f4i bi\u1ebft r\u1eb1ng m\u1ed9t s\u1ed1 b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 mong \u0111\u1ee3i qu\u00e1 nhi\u1ec1u v\u1edbi con c\u00e1i h\u1ecd v\u00ec h\u1ecd y\u00eau con h\u1ecd v\u00e0 mu\u1ed1n \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t nh\u1ea5t cho con h\u1ecd v\u00e0 h\u1ecd ngh\u0129 con h\u1ecd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ea1t \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c b\u1ea5t k\u00ec c\u00e1i g\u00ec m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 t\u00ednh th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf v\u1ec1 \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3.<\/p>\n
Trong ngh\u1ec1 d\u1ea1y h\u1ecdc c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh, t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 th\u1ea5y nhi\u1ec1u h\u1ecdc sinh kh\u00f4ng th\u00edch to\u00e1n, khoa h\u1ecdc hay c\u00f4ng ngh\u1ec7 v\u00ec ch\u00fang b\u1ecb \u00e9p bu\u1ed9c l\u00ean h\u1ecd t\u1eeb khi h\u1ecd c\u00f2n tr\u1ebb nh\u01b0ng h\u1ecd kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ph\u00e9p kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 ra nh\u1eefng l\u0129nh v\u1ef1c n\u00e0y c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 vui \u0111\u00f9a v\u00e0 th\u00edch th\u00fa th\u1ebf n\u00e0o. M\u1ed9t s\u1ed1 h\u1ecdc sinh n\u00f3i v\u1edbi t\u00f4i l\u00e0 nh\u1eefng l\u0129nh v\u1ef1c n\u00e0y l\u00e0 \u201ctai \u01b0\u01a1ng\u201d v\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd mu\u1ed1n h\u1ecdc ch\u00fang v\u00ec h\u1ecd s\u1ee3 ch\u00fang. V\u00e0i n\u0103m tr\u01b0\u1edbc, m\u1ed9t h\u1ecdc sinh n\u00f3i v\u1edbi t\u00f4i l\u00e0 khi b\u1ea1n b\u00e8 h\u1ecd \u0111i ngh\u1ec9 h\u00e8, anh ta b\u1ecb bu\u1ed9c ph\u1ea3i h\u1ecdc ng\u00f4n ng\u1eef l\u1eadp tr\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 cho anh ta c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c h\u1ea1ng nh\u1ea5t tr\u01b0\u1eddng. T\u1eeb khi anh ta \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c nh\u1eadn v\u00e0o Carnegie Mellon, anh ta \u0111\u00e3 kh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n h\u1ecdc Khoa h\u1ecdc m\u00e1y t\u00ednh th\u00eam n\u1eefa.<\/p>\n
Nhi\u1ec1u ph\u1ee5 huynh kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft r\u1eb1ng mong \u0111\u1ee3i qu\u00e1 nhi\u1ec1u v\u1edbi con c\u00e1i h\u1ecd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 t\u1ea1o ra v\u1ebft th\u01b0\u01a1ng kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ch\u1eefa l\u00e0nh trong t\u00e2m l\u00ed con h\u1ecd. T\u1ea5t nhi\u00ean, con c\u00e1i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng mu\u1ed1n l\u00e0m cho b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 h\u1ecd t\u1ef1 h\u00e0o, nh\u01b0ng m\u1ed9t s\u1ed1 b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 l\u00e0m cho \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 th\u00e0nh kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c. \u0110i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 t\u1ea1o ra cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn b\u1ea5t h\u1ea1nh khi h\u1ecd kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 ho\u00e0n th\u00e0nh \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c mong \u01b0\u1edbc c\u1ee7a b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 h\u1ecd v\u00e0 tr\u1edf n\u00ean mong manh h\u01a1n v\u00e0 h\u1ea1 th\u1ea5p l\u00f2ng t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd.<\/p>\n
T\u00f4i th\u01b0\u1eddng khuy\u00ean c\u00e1c b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 r\u1eb1ng t\u1ed1t nh\u1ea5t l\u00e0 khuy\u1ebfn kh\u00edch con c\u00e1i h\u1ecd h\u1ecdc v\u00e0 kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 \u0111i\u1ec1u ch\u00fang th\u00edch h\u01a1n l\u00e0 \u00e9p bu\u1ed9c c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 l\u00ean ch\u00fang. C\u00e1ch t\u1ed1t nh\u1ea5t l\u00e0 cung c\u1ea5p cho ch\u00fang s\u00e1ch v\u1edf v\u1ec1 l\u1ecbch s\u1eed, khoa h\u1ecdc v\u00e0 c\u00f4ng ngh\u1ec7 m\u00e0 ch\u00fang c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ch\u1ecdn \u0111\u1ecdc t\u1eeb s\u1edbm khi ch\u00fang c\u00f2n tr\u1ebb. \u0110i\u1ec1u quan tr\u1ecdng v\u1edbi c\u00e1c b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 l\u00e0 l\u00e0m cho vi\u1ec7c \u0111\u1ecdc s\u00e1ch th\u00e0nh ho\u1ea1t \u0111\u1ed9ng vui \u0111\u00f9a khi c\u1ea3 b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 v\u00e0 con c\u00e1i c\u00f9ng \u0111\u1ecdc v\u1edbi nhau. Con c\u00e1i n\u00ean \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c cho s\u1ef1 ch\u1ecdn l\u1ef1a \u0111\u1ec3 ph\u00e1t tri\u1ec3n m\u1ed1i quan t\u00e2m ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang \u0111\u1ec3 cho ch\u00fang c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0m quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh v\u1ec1 sau trong cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng \u0111\u1ec3 l\u00e0m \u0111i\u1ec1u ch\u00fang mu\u1ed1n. Khoa h\u1ecdc v\u00e0 c\u00f4ng ngh\u1ec7 n\u00ean \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c coi nh\u01b0 c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 h\u1eefu d\u1ee5ng v\u00e0 vui \u0111\u00f9a \u0111\u1ec3 h\u1ecdc, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 b\u1ecb \u00e9p bu\u1ed9c. B\u1eb1ng vi\u1ec7c \u0111\u1ecdc c\u00f9ng nhau, c\u1ea3 b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 v\u00e0 con c\u00e1i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ph\u00e1t tri\u1ec3n hi\u1ec3u bi\u1ebft l\u1eabn nhau n\u01a1i b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 quan s\u00e1t v\u00e0 khuy\u1ebfn kh\u00edch con c\u00e1i h\u1ecd h\u1ecdc nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
—English version—<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Encouragement or Expectation<\/p>\n
Last night I received an email from a student: \u201cMy parents pressured me to study something that I do not like. They want me to study Medicine or Engineering. Anything else is NOT acceptable. My parents think if I am NOT a doctor or an engineer, then I am a failure to my family. I do not know what to do. Please help.\u201d<\/p>\n
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Answer: Your parents want the best for you but they may not have the thorough knowledge of the global market so they think that Medicine and Engineering are the only choices. Of course, there are many other choices too but I do not know what do you like or what do you want to study? It is best to discuss openly other options with them in a calm manner without being emotional.<\/p>\n
From your parents\u2019 view, they believe that you can have a good career and live well in these positions (i.e., Doctor or Engineer) but they may not know whether you have the potential to succeed in these fields or not. I know that there are many students who fail to meet their goal and disappoint their family because they could not complete their education in the fields that are not their choice. I know that some parents expect too much out of their children because they love them and want the best for them and they think their children could achieve anything without being practical about it.<\/p>\n
In my teaching career, I have seen many students do not like math, science or technology because they were forced upon them since they were young but they were never allowed to discover how these fields could be fun and enjoyable. Some students told me that these fields are a \u201ccurse\u201d and never want to learn them as they are afraid of them. A few years ago, a student told me that when their friends went on vacation in the summer, he was forced to study programming languages so he can get to the top school. Since he was accepted to Carnegie Mellon, he did not want to study Computer Science anymore.<\/p>\n
Many parents do not know that expect too much from their children can create a wound that can never be healed in their children\u2019s psyche. Of course, children always want to make their parents proud, but some parents make it impossible. This can create an unhappy adult life when they could not fulfill their parents\u2019 wishes and become more fragile and have low self-esteem because of their failure.<\/p>\n
I often advise parents that it is best to encourage their children to learn and discover what they like than forcing something on them. The best way is providing them with books on history, science, and technology that they can choose to read early when they are young. It is important for parents to make the book reading as a fun activity when both parents and children are reading together. Children should be given a choice to develop their own interest so they can make their decision later in life to do what they want. Science and technology should be considered as something useful and fun to learn, not something to be forced upon. By reading together, both parents and children can develop a mutual understanding of each other where parents can observe and encourage their children to learn more.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u0110\u00eam qua t\u00f4i nh\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c m\u1ed9t email t\u1eeb m\u1ed9t h\u1ecdc sinh: \u201cB\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 em \u00e9p em h\u1ecdc c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 m\u00e0 em kh\u00f4ng th\u00edch. H\u1ecd … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5865","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-loi-khuyen-cho-phu-huynh","category-loi-khuyen-cho-sinh-vien"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5865","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5865"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5865\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5866,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5865\/revisions\/5866"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5865"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5865"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5865"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}