{"id":1625,"date":"2013-07-03T10:21:27","date_gmt":"2013-07-03T03:21:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/science-technology.vn\/?p=1625"},"modified":"2013-07-03T10:21:27","modified_gmt":"2013-07-03T03:21:27","slug":"quan-he-gia-dinh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/?p=1625","title":{"rendered":"Quan h\u1ec7 gia \u0111\u00ecnh"},"content":{"rendered":"

Nh\u01b0 t\u00f4i th\u01b0\u1eddng y\u00eau c\u1ea7u sinh vi\u00ean \u0111\u00e3 t\u1ed1t nghi\u1ec7p \u0111ang l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c trong c\u00f4ng nghi\u1ec7p chia s\u1ebb kinh nghi\u1ec7m v\u1edbi sinh vi\u00ean hi\u1ec7n th\u1eddi. H\u00f4m qua, t\u00f4i nh\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c m\u1ed9t email t\u1eeb m\u1ed9t sinh vi\u00ean \u0111\u00e3 t\u1ed1t nghi\u1ec7p v\u00e0i n\u0103m tr\u01b0\u1edbc. Kinh nghi\u1ec7m c\u1ee7a anh \u1ea5y l\u00e0 kh\u00e1c v\u1edbi h\u1ea7u h\u1ebft m\u1ecdi ng\u01b0\u1eddi v\u00e0 t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n chia s\u1ebb v\u1edbi c\u00e1c b\u1ea1n.<\/span><\/p>\n

Th\u01b0a gi\u00e1o s\u01b0,<\/p>\n

Em \u0111\u00e3 nh\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c email c\u1ee7a th\u1ea7y nh\u1eafc em chia s\u1ebb kinh nghi\u1ec7m cho n\u00ean em mu\u1ed1n k\u1ec3 ch\u00fat \u00edt v\u1ec1 b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n em v\u1edbi hi v\u1ecdng r\u1eb1ng n\u00f3 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 gi\u00fap cho c\u00e1c sinh vi\u00ean v\u1eabn \u0111ang h\u1ed9i t\u1ee5 v\u00e0o th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 t\u00ednh c\u00e1ch \u0111\u1ea1o \u0111\u1ee9c t\u1ed1t. Cho n\u00ean thay v\u00ec v\u1eady em ngh\u0129 em s\u1ebd chia s\u1ebb c\u00e2u chuy\u1ec7n c\u1ee7a em v\u1ec1 quan h\u1ec7 gia \u0111\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n

Ng\u00e0y nay t\u1ea5t c\u1ea3 ch\u00fang ta \u0111\u1ec1u \u0111ang b\u1ecb k\u00e9o v\u00e0o c\u01a1n xo\u00e1y l\u1ed1c c\u1ee7a c\u00f4ng ngh\u1ec7. T\u1ea5t c\u1ea3 ch\u00fang ta \u0111\u1ec1u c\u00f3 laptops, \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i di \u0111\u1ed9ng, internet v\u00e0 nhi\u1ec1u thi\u1ebft b\u1ecb th\u1ebf. T\u1ea5t c\u1ea3 ch\u00fang ta \u0111\u1ec1u b\u1eadn r\u1ed9n v\u1edbi nhi\u1ec1u th\u1ee9 th\u1ebf c\u1ea7n s\u1ef1 ch\u00fa \u00fd c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang ta. Ch\u00fang ta b\u1eadn r\u1ed9n th\u1ebf v\u1edbi c\u00e1c bi\u1ebfn c\u1ed1 h\u00e0ng ng\u00e0y v\u00e0 th\u01b0\u1eddng qu\u00ean m\u1ea5t ch\u00fang ta l\u00e0 ai v\u00e0 ch\u00fang ta gi\u1ea3 \u0111\u1ecbnh l\u00e0 c\u00e1i g\u00ec. Nh\u01b0 nhi\u1ec1u thanh ni\u00ean, t\u00f4i r\u1eddi kh\u1ecfi gia \u0111\u00ecnh \u1edf Maine \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1edbi Carnegie Mellon r\u1ed3i sau khi t\u1ed1t nghi\u1ec7p t\u00f4i t\u00ecm \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c vi\u1ec7c l\u00e0m \u1edf California. T\u00f4i l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c r\u1ea5t ch\u0103m ch\u1ec9 v\u00e0 cu\u1ed1i c\u00f9ng \u0111\u00e3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ec1 b\u1ea1t v\u00e0o v\u1ecb tr\u00ed tr\u00ean \u0111\u1ec9nh v\u1edbi l\u01b0\u01a1ng cao v\u00e0 tu\u1ef3 ch\u1ecdn c\u1ed5 ph\u1ea7n. V\u00ec t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 r\u1eddi kh\u1ecfi gia \u0111\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 v\u00e0o \u0111\u1ea1i h\u1ecdc, t\u00f4i ch\u01b0a h\u1ec1 quay v\u1ec1 v\u00e0 trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c trong c\u00f4ng nghi\u1ec7p, t\u00f4i ch\u01b0a h\u1ec1 v\u1ec1 nh\u00e0 th\u0103m gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng b\u1eadn r\u1ed9n. D\u1eabn l\u00e1i th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng l\u00e0 quan tr\u1ecdng \u0111\u1ed1i v\u1edbi t\u00f4i h\u01a1n quan h\u1ec7 gia \u0111\u00ecnh c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i.<\/p>\n

\u0110\u00e3 c\u00f3 hai c\u00e1i ch\u1ebft trong gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i k\u1ec3 t\u1eeb khi t\u00f4i tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh ph\u00f3 ch\u1ee7 t\u1ecbch c\u1ee7a c\u00f4ng ti. B\u00e0 t\u00f4i qua \u0111\u1eddi khi t\u00f4i \u0111ang b\u1eadn chuy\u1ec7n kinh doanh \u1edf Tokyo. B\u00e0 \u0111\u00e3 ph\u1ea3i \u1edf b\u1ec7nh vi\u1ec7n trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m, s\u1ee9c kho\u1ebb c\u1ee7a b\u00e0 suy \u0111\u1ed3i theo c\u00e1ch t\u1ef1 nhi\u00ean do tu\u1ed5i gi\u00e0. T\u00f4i quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh \u1edf l\u1ea1i Nh\u1eadt B\u1ea3n \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft th\u00fac vi\u1ec7c kinh doanh v\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng d\u1ef1 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u00e1m tang c\u1ee7a b\u00e0. Suy ngh\u0129 c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i v\u00e0o l\u00fac \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 \u1edf ch\u1ed7 ho\u00e0n th\u00e0nh chuy\u1ec7n kinh doanh l\u00e0 quan tr\u1ecdng h\u01a1n c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n \u1edf nh\u00e0. Sau r\u1ed1t, c\u00f4ng ti t\u00f4i c\u1ea7n kinh doanh v\u00e0 anh t\u00f4i \u1edf nh\u00e0 r\u1ed3i, ch\u0103m s\u00f3c cho b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. V\u00ec anh t\u00f4i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng \u1edf g\u1ea7n b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i h\u01a1n t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i ngh\u0129 \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n c\u1ea3 cho anh \u1ea5y l\u00e0 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 h\u1ecd trong bi\u1ebfn c\u1ed1 n\u00e0y. N\u1ebfu h\u1ecd c\u1ea7n c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 nh\u01b0 ti\u1ec1n, anh \u1ea5y bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 g\u1ecdi t\u00f4i v\u00e0 t\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 g\u1eedi s\u00e9c cho anh \u1ea5y. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 c\u00e1ch \u0111i\u1ec3n h\u00ecnh cho t\u00f4i ngh\u0129 v\u1ec1 gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i trong h\u1ea7u h\u1ebft cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i.<\/p>\n

L\u00e0 ph\u00f3 ch\u1ee7 t\u1ecbch c\u1ee7a m\u1ed9t c\u00f4ng ti to\u00e0n c\u1ea7u l\u1edbn, t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi m\u1ecdi ng\u01b0\u1eddi tr\u00ean kh\u1eafp th\u1ebf gi\u1edbi nh\u01b0ng t\u00f4i ch\u01b0a bao gi\u1edd g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 n\u00f3i v\u1edbi kh\u00e1ch h\u00e0ng v\u1ec1 m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9, t\u1eeb ph\u1ea7n m\u1ec1m, ph\u1ea7n c\u1ee9ng t\u1edbi t\u00ednh to\u00e1n m\u00e2y nh\u01b0ng t\u00f4i ch\u1eb3ng c\u00f3 g\u00ec \u0111\u1ec3 n\u00f3i v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 n\u00f3i g\u00ec v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i? \u201cCh\u00e0o m\u1eb9, con kho\u1ebb, m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9 \u0111\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t!\u201d N\u00f3 l\u00e0 v\u1eady th\u00f4i. T\u00f4i th\u00e0 t\u1eadp trung v\u00e0o chuy\u1ec7n kinh doanh hay t\u00ednh n\u0103ng ph\u1ea7n m\u1ec1m m\u1edbi cho c\u00f4ng ti h\u01a1n. V\u1edbi t\u00f4i th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng l\u00e0 m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9, v\u00ec l\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng, t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n gi\u1eef n\u00f3 theo c\u00e1ch \u0111\u00f3. T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 kh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n b\u1ecb b\u1eadn t\u00e2m v\u1edbi nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ea7m th\u01b0\u1eddng nh\u01b0 nh\u1eefng cu\u1ed9c n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i ch\u00e1n ng\u1eaft v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. C\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u1ec3 l\u00e0m v\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 th\u1eddi gian.<\/p>\n

Trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m, m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n cho t\u00f4i. Ph\u1ea7n l\u1edbn c\u00e1c cu\u1ed9c \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec1u r\u1ea5t m\u1ed9t ph\u00eda. M\u1eb9 t\u00f4i theo “c\u00e1ch ng\u01b0\u1eddi m\u1eb9” \u0111i\u1ec3n h\u00ecnh to\u00e0n h\u1ecfi v\u1ec1 m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9 \u0111ang x\u1ea3y ra trong \u0111\u1eddi t\u00f4i. M\u1eb9 t\u00f4i quan t\u00e2m v\u1ec1 t\u00f4i \u0103n th\u1ee9 g\u00ec? T\u00f4i c\u00e2n n\u1eb7ng bao nhi\u00eau? T\u00f4i c\u00f3 gi\u1eef s\u1ee9c kho\u1ebb cho b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng? Th\u1ec9nh tho\u1ea3ng m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i h\u1ecfi li\u1ec7u t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 g\u1eb7p ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef m\u00e0 t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n coi l\u00e0 v\u1ee3 t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng. M\u1eb9 t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n r\u1eb1ng t\u00f4i s\u1ebd l\u1ea5y v\u1ee3 v\u00e0 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 c\u00f3 ch\u00e1u m\u1ed9t ng\u00e0y n\u00e0o \u0111\u00f3. T\u00f4i tr\u1ea3 l\u1eddi c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi c\u1ee7a m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch l\u1ec5 ph\u00e9p v\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 c\u00e1ch d\u1ec5 nh\u1ea5t \u0111\u1ec3 n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. Sau \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i, t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng h\u1ec1 g\u1ecdi l\u1ea1i cho m\u1eb9. V\u00e0 th\u00f4ng th\u01b0\u1eddng ch\u00fang t\u00f4i s\u1ebd kh\u00f4ng n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n ch\u1eebng n\u00e0o m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i c\u00f2n ch\u01b0a g\u1ecdi l\u1ea1i cho t\u00f4i. Trong t\u00e2m tr\u00ed t\u00f4i, t\u00f4i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng c\u00f3 \u00fd t\u01b0\u1edfng r\u1eb1ng \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y ngh\u0129a l\u00e0 t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ee9a con t\u1ed1t. Tuy nhi\u00ean, t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y nhi\u1ec1u s\u1ef1 ch\u00fa \u00fd c\u1ee7a m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i g\u00e2y phi\u1ec1n ph\u1ee9c. Gi\u1ed1ng nh\u01b0 \u0111\u1ee9a tr\u1ebb kh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n g\u00ec kh\u00e1c ngo\u00e0i vi\u1ec7c ra kh\u1ecfi nh\u00e0 v\u00e0 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c t\u1ef1 do. Cho d\u00f9 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed9c l\u1eadp v\u1edbi gia \u0111\u00ecnh trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m, t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 bu\u00f4ng b\u1ecf \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 n\u00e0y v\u1ec1 vi\u1ec7c t\u1ef1 do kh\u1ecfi gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i.<\/p>\n

M\u1ed9t \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0m thay \u0111\u1ed5i t\u00f4i l\u00e0 sau khi b\u00e0 t\u00f4i qua \u0111\u1eddi t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. Trong phi\u00ean l\u00e0m kinh doanh \u1edf Tokyo, sau khi nghe tin t\u1eeb anh t\u00f4i r\u1eb1ng b\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 qua \u0111\u1eddi, t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec3 xem m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i l\u00e0m th\u1ebf n\u00e0o, \u0111\u1ec3 xem m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n n\u00f3i v\u1ec1 c\u00e1i g\u00ec kh\u00f4ng. T\u00f4i ngh\u0129 c\u00fa \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i n\u00e0y l\u00e0 \u0111i\u1ec3m r\u1ebd ch\u00ednh trong m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. C\u00f3 l\u1ebd \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 l\u1ea7n \u0111\u1ea7u ti\u00ean trong \u0111\u1eddi t\u00f4i m\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec3 nghe \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i ph\u1ea3i n\u00f3i.<\/p>\n

Qu\u00e3ng m\u1ed9t th\u00e1ng sau, b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i, ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e3 b\u1ecb ung th\u01b0 trong n\u0103m tr\u01b0\u1edbc, \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c b\u00e1c s\u0129 b\u1ea3o l\u00e0 ung th\u01b0 \u0111\u00e3 lan r\u1ed9ng trong th\u00e2n th\u1ec3 b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i v\u00e0 b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i ch\u1eafc ch\u1eafn ch\u1ebft. S\u1ee9c kho\u1ebb b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i suy \u0111\u1ed3i nhanh ch\u00f3ng. M\u1eb9 t\u00f4i quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh d\u1eebng l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c \u0111\u1ec3 \u1edf nh\u00e0 ch\u0103m s\u00f3c b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i th\u01b0\u1eddng xuy\u00ean h\u01a1n. V\u1ec1 c\u0103n b\u1ea3n, t\u00f4i ch\u1ec9 l\u1eafng nghe \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i ph\u1ea3i n\u00f3i. T\u00f4i c\u00e0ng g\u1ecdi nhi\u1ec1u, t\u00f4i c\u00e0ng b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 cao l\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 ph\u00e1t tri\u1ec3n lo\u1ea1i quan h\u1ec7 m\u1edbi v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. T\u00f4i h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i, nh\u01b0ng t\u00f4i c\u0169ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ee3i t\u1eeb \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 theo c\u00e1ch m\u1edbi. Khi t\u00f4i g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i, t\u00f4i ch\u1ec9 h\u1ecfi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i v\u1ec1 m\u1ecdi s\u1ef1 th\u1ebf n\u00e0o v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i v\u00e0 b\u1ed1 t\u00f4i ra l\u00e0m sao. T\u00f4i h\u1ecfi li\u1ec7u m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i c\u00f3 nh\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 m\u00e0 m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i c\u1ea7n kh\u00f4ng. T\u00f4i c\u0169ng \u0111\u1ec3 \u00fd r\u1eb1ng t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 t\u1eadn h\u01b0\u1edfng nh\u1eefng cu\u1ed9c n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n n\u00e0y v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n l\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 bao gi\u1edd c\u00f3 v\u1edbi phong c\u00e1ch c\u0169 c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i v\u1ec1 n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n m\u1ed9t chi\u1ec1u.<\/p>\n

B\u1ed1 t\u00f4i qua \u0111\u1eddi v\u00e0 t\u00f4i v\u1ec1 nh\u00e0 l\u1ea7n n\u00e0y. \u0110\u00e3 h\u01a1n m\u01b0\u1eddi n\u0103m t\u00f4i m\u1edbi v\u1ec1 nh\u00e0 t\u1eeb khi t\u00f4i l\u1edbn l\u00ean. T\u00f4i \u1edf nh\u00e0 hai tu\u1ea7n v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i \u0111i d\u1ea1o m\u1ecdi ng\u00e0y, v\u00e0 \u0111i ch\u1ee3 mua th\u1ee9c \u0103n c\u00f9ng nhau. Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i \u0103n t\u1ed1i l\u00fac m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i k\u1ec3 nh\u1eefng c\u00e2u chuy\u1ec7n v\u1ec1 v\u00e0i th\u00e1ng tr\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111\u00e3 th\u1ebf n\u00e0o, v\u00e0 ngh\u0129 v\u1ec1 \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n l\u00e0m trong t\u01b0\u01a1ng lai. M\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang t\u00f4i li\u00ean t\u1ee5c thay \u0111\u1ed5i t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n, v\u00e0 theo c\u00e1ch m\u1edbi to\u00e0n b\u1ed9. Tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi l\u00ean gi\u01b0\u1eddng, m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i v\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec1u n\u00f3i “Con y\u00eau m\u1eb9” hay “M\u1eb9 y\u00eau con v\u1edbi nhau. T\u00f4i nh\u1edb khi t\u00f4i c\u00f2n tr\u1ebb; m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng n\u00f3i \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi ch\u00fang t\u00f4i l\u00ean gi\u01b0\u1eddng, m\u00e0 b\u1eb1ng c\u00e1ch n\u00e0o \u0111\u00f3 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 qu\u00ean m\u1ea5t trong th\u1eddi ni\u00ean thi\u1ebfu.<\/p>\n

B\u00e2y gi\u1edd t\u00f4i tr\u1edf l\u1ea1i California, t\u00f4i th\u01b0\u1eddng g\u1ecdi \u0111i\u1ec7n cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i v\u00e0o bu\u1ed5i tr\u01b0a ch\u1ec9 \u0111\u1ec3 th\u00f4ng b\u00e1o. T\u00f4i c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y nh\u01b0 t\u00f4i l\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 quan tr\u1ecdng cho m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i. Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i g\u1ea7n g\u0169i h\u01a1n l\u00e0 ch\u00fang t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0 v\u1eady t\u1eeb th\u1eddi t\u00f4i c\u00f2n r\u1ea5t tr\u1ebb. T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 tr\u1edf n\u00ean bi\u1ebft l\u1eafng nghe m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n, v\u00e0 t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y nhi\u1ec1u tho\u1ea3i m\u00e1i khi n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi m\u1eb9. Th\u1ec9nh tho\u1ea3ng khi t\u00f4i c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec1u g\u1ecdi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i ch\u1ec9 \u0111\u1ec3 nghe m\u1eb9 n\u00f3i, v\u00e0 t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y r\u1eb1ng vi\u1ec7c n\u00f3i chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i gi\u00fap cho t\u00f4i c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac h\u01a1n. \u0110i\u1ec1u ng\u1ea1c nhi\u00ean l\u00e0 bao nhi\u00eau \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00e3 thay \u0111\u1ed5i gi\u1eefa ch\u00fang t\u00f4i qua v\u00e0i th\u00e1ng n\u00e0y.<\/p>\n

T\u00f4i ngh\u0129 nhi\u1ec1u thanh ni\u00ean ng\u00e0y nay \u0111ang tr\u1ea3i qua c\u00f9ng t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng nh\u01b0 c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i. Ch\u00fang ta b\u1eadn r\u1ed9n th\u1ebf; ch\u00fang ta b\u1ecb l\u00e1i \u0111i b\u1edfi nhi\u1ec1u th\u1ebf t\u1edbi m\u1ee9c l\u00e0m sao l\u00e3ng ch\u00fang ta kh\u1ecfi \u0111i\u1ec1u qu\u00ed gi\u00e1 trong cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng. T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 d\u00e0nh nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m \u1edf xa gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i v\u00ec t\u00f4i t\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng l\u00e0 m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9. B\u00e2y gi\u1edd t\u00f4i nh\u1eadn ra r\u1eb1ng t\u00f4i g\u1ea7n nh\u01b0 \u0111\u00e1nh m\u1ea5t \u0111i\u1ec1u qu\u00ed gi\u00e1 trong \u0111\u1eddi t\u00f4i: Quan h\u1ec7 c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i v\u1edbi gia \u0111\u00ecnh t\u00f4i. V\u1edbi t\u00f4i, \u1edf nh\u00e0 trong hai tu\u1ea7n cho ph\u00e9p t\u00f4i c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u th\u1eddi gian h\u01a1n \u0111\u1ec3 suy t\u01b0, kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb qu\u00e1 b\u1eadn t\u00e2m t\u1edbi doanh nghi\u1ec7p ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i, v\u00e0 c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u th\u1eddi gian nghe v\u00e0 ch\u00fa \u00fd. \u0110\u1ed3ng th\u1eddi, n\u00f3 cho ph\u00e9p t\u00f4i b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u ngh\u0129 v\u1ec1 \u0111\u1eddi t\u00f4i v\u00e0 c\u00e1ch t\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u00e3 c\u00f3 kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng \u0111\u1ed1i x\u1eed v\u1edbi m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i theo c\u00e1ch kh\u00e1c. B\u00e2y gi\u1edd t\u00f4i hi\u1ec3u \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u1eb9 t\u00f4i n\u00f3i: \u201cCon c\u00e1i kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd hi\u1ec3u \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 ch\u00fang ch\u1eebng n\u00e0o ch\u00fang ch\u01b0a tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9.\u201d B\u1ea1n ch\u01b0a bao gi\u1edd \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 cao t\u00ecnh y\u00eau c\u1ee7a b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 b\u1ea1n ch\u1eebng n\u00e0o b\u1ea1n ch\u01b0a m\u1ea5t n\u00f3. V\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 g\u1ea7n \u0111\u00e1nh m\u1ea5t n\u00f3 nh\u01b0ng may m\u1eafn t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 t\u00ecm th\u1ea5y n\u00f3 tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi qu\u00e1 tr\u1ec5.<\/p>\n

T\u00f4i ngh\u0129 m\u1ed9t trong nh\u1eefng b\u00e0i h\u1ecdc quan tr\u1ecdng nh\u1ea5t t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 h\u1ecdc t\u1eeb \u0111\u00e2y, ch\u00ednh l\u00e0 c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 h\u1ecdc \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c t\u1eeb s\u00e1ch v\u1edf l\u00e0 \u1edf ch\u1ed7 khi m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 s\u1ef1 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 c\u1ee7a gia \u0111\u00ecnh ch\u0103m lo, \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 cho ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00f3 trong vi\u1ec7c ch\u0103m nom t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n cho gia \u0111\u00ecnh ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd, c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 \u0111em t\u1edbi \u00edch l\u1ee3i cho m\u1ecdi ng\u01b0\u1eddi. Khi b\u1ea1n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c y\u00eau, b\u1ea1n bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 t\u00ecnh y\u00eau, v\u00e0 ch\u1ec9 th\u1ebf b\u1ea1n m\u1edbi c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 y\u00eau ai \u0111\u00f3. N\u00f3 l\u00e0 g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5 m\u00e0 b\u1eb1ng c\u00e1ch n\u00e0o \u0111\u00f3 trong th\u1eddi \u0111\u1ea1i c\u00f4ng ngh\u1ec7 cao n\u00e0y, nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi trong ch\u00fang ta qu\u00ean m\u1ea5t r\u1eb1ng ch\u00fang ta c\u00f3 g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5. \u0110\u1ea1o l\u00e0m con v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta l\u00e0 nu\u00f4i d\u01b0\u1ee1ng g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5 ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta \u0111\u1ec3 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t con ng\u01b0\u1eddi. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 nguy\u00ean l\u00ed n\u1ec1n t\u1ea3ng. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 ngh\u0129a v\u1ee5 con ng\u01b0\u1eddi quan tr\u1ecdng nh\u1ea5t c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang ta. N\u1ebfu ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta \u0111\u1ed1i x\u1eed v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 m\u00ecnh t\u1ec7 b\u1ea1c, ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta qu\u00ean m\u1ea5t g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5 c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 qu\u00ean lu\u00f4n ngu\u1ed3n g\u1ed1c c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n

Khi ch\u00fang ta c\u00f2n tr\u1ebb, ch\u00fang ta h\u1ecdc \u1edf tr\u01b0\u1eddng ti\u1ec3u h\u1ecdc \u0111\u1ea1o l\u00e0m con v\u1edbi b\u1ed1 m\u1eb9 ch\u00fang ta v\u00e0 k\u00ednh tr\u1ecdng ng\u01b0\u1eddi gi\u00e0 v\u00e0 th\u1ea7y gi\u00e1o. Nh\u01b0ng ch\u00fang ta th\u01b0\u1eddng qu\u00ean \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 khi ch\u00fang ta l\u1edbn l\u00ean. Ch\u00fang ta ph\u1ea3i kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 l\u1ea1i g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5 ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a ch\u00fang ta tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 qu\u00e1 mu\u1ed9n. \u0110\u00f3 l\u00e0 l\u00ed do t\u1ea1i sao t\u00f4i vi\u1ebft b\u1ee9c th\u01b0 n\u00e0y nh\u01b0 c\u00e1i g\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 \u0111\u1ec3 chia s\u1ebb v\u1edbi c\u00e1c b\u1ea1n sinh vi\u00ean hi\u1ec7n th\u1eddi: \u0110\u1eebng bao gi\u1edd qu\u00ean b\u1ea1n xu\u1ea5t th\u00e2n t\u1eeb \u0111\u00e2u; \u0111\u1eebng bao gi\u1edd qu\u00ean g\u1ed1c r\u1ec5 ri\u00eang c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n v\u00e0 m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 gia \u0111\u00ecnh l\u00e0 \u0111i\u1ec1u qu\u00ed gi\u00e1 nh\u1ea5t m\u00e0 b\u1ea1n c\u00f3 trong cu\u1ed9c \u0111\u1eddi n\u00e0y.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

—-English version—-<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Family Relationsh\u200bip<\/p>\n

As I often ask graduated students who work in industry to share experiences with current students. Yesterday, I received an email from a student who graduated several years ago. His experience was different from most and I want to share with you.<\/p>\n

Dear Professor,<\/p>\n

I have received your email reminding me of sharing experience so I like to tell a little bit about myself with the hope that it may help students who are still focusing on being successful without having a good moral character. So I thought I would share my story about family relationship instead.<\/p>\n

Today we are all being pulled into a whirlwind of technology. We all have laptops, mobile phones, internet and so many devices. We are all busy with so many things that need our attention. We are so occupied with daily events and often forget who we are and what we supposed to be. Like many young man, I left home in Maine to go to Carnegie Mellon then after graduated I found a good job in California. I worked very hard and eventually got promoted to the top position with high salary and stock options. Since I left home for college, I never return and for many years of working in industry, I never went home to visit my family. I was always busy. The drive to be successful was more important to me than my family relationship.<\/p>\n

There have been two deaths in my family since I became the vice president of the company. My grandmother passed away while I was busy negotiates a business deal in Tokyo. She had been hospitalized for years, her health deteriorating in a natural way due to her old age. I decided to stay in Japan to finish my business and missed her funeral. My thinking at the time was that it was more important for me to complete the deal than to be at home in person. After all, my company needs the business and my brother was home, taking care of my parents. Since my brother was always closer to my parents than me. I thought it would be a better for him to support them during this event. If they need something like money, he can always call me and I can send him a check. This was a typical way for me to think about my family for most of my adult life.<\/p>\n

As the vice president of a large global company, I talked to people all over the world but I never call home to talk to my parents. I can talk to customers about everything, from software, hardware to cloud computing but I had nothing to talk to my parents. What could I say to my mother? \u201cHello mom, I am OK, everything is good!\u201d That was it. I rather focused on the business deals or new software features for the company. To me success was everything, as a successful person, I wanted to keep it that way. I did not want to be bothered with mundane things such as boring phone calls to my parents. There were so many things to do and I just did not have time.<\/p>\n

For many years, my mother would always call me. Most of our phone conversations were very one-sided. My mother in a typical \u201cmotherly way\u201d would ask about all the things that were happening in my life. She concerned about what food that I ate? How much did I weight? Did I exercise to keep myself healthy? Sometime she asked whether I have met a woman that I would consider to be my wife. She wished that I would marry and she could have grandchildren someday. I would answer her questions politely because it was the easiest way to talk to her. After her call, I never call her back. And usually we would not talk until she called me again. In my mind I always had an idea that this meant I was not really being a good son. However, I found a lot of her attention annoying. Like a young child who wants nothing else but to get out of the house and be free. Even though I had been independent from family for many years, I had not really let go of this attitude of being free from my family.<\/p>\n

One thing that changed for me was after my grandmother passed away I called my mother instead. During the business session in Tokyo, after I had heard the news from my brother that my grandmother had passed away, I called my mother to see how she was doing, to see if she wanted to talk about anything. I think this phone call was a major turning point in my relationship with my mother. It was perhaps the first time in my life that I called my mother to listen to what she had to say.<\/p>\n

About a month later, my father, who had developed cancer over the previous year, was told by his doctor that the cancer had spread to his body and he would certainly die. His health deteriorated rapidly. My mother decided to stop working to stay home and take care of him. I began calling to talk to her more often. Basically, I just listened to what she had to say. The more I called, the more I began to appreciate that I was developing a new kind of relationship with her. I was much more supportive of her, but also that I was benefitting from it in a new way. When I would call, I would only ask her about how things were for her and how my father was doing. I asked if she was getting all the support that she needed. I also noticed that I was enjoying these conversations with my mother much more than I ever had with our old style of one sided talking.<\/p>\n

My father passed away and I went home this time. It has been more than ten years that I came back to the house I grew up in. I stayed for two weeks with my mother. We went for walks every day, and went shopping for food together. We had dinner where she told me stories about what the past few months had been like, and thought about what she wanted to do in the future. Our relationship continued to change for the better, and in entirely new ways. Before bed, my mother and I would say \u201cI love you\u201d to one another. I remembered when I was young; my mother always said that before we went to bed, which somehow I had forgotten during my adolescence.<\/p>\n

Now that I am back to California, I often call my mother in the afternoon just to check in. I feel like I am an important support person for her. We are closer than we have been since I was very young. I have become much better at listening to her, and I find a lot of comfort in talking with her. Sometimes when I am feeling stress I would call her just to listen to her talk, and I find that talking to her helps me feel more happier. It is amazing how much has changed between us over the past few months.<\/p>\n

I think many young men today are experiencing the same situation like mine. We are so busy; we are so driven by so many things that distract us from the precious thing in life. I spent so many years away from my family as I think success is everything. Now I realize that I almost lost the most precious thing in my life: My relationship with my family. For me, being at home for two weeks allowed more time for me to contemplate, without getting so concern in my own business, and with more time to listen and pay attention. At the same time, it allowed me to begin to think about my life and how I might be able to treat my mother differently. Now I understand what my mother said: \u201cChildren never understand their parents until they become parents\u201d You never appreciate your mother\u2019s love until you lost it. And I almost lost it but fortunately I found it before it is too late.<\/p>\n

I think one of the most important lessons I have learned from this, which is something I could never learn from books is that when a person has the support of a caring family, it supports that person in taking better care of their own family, something that brings benefits to everyone. When you are loved, you know about love, and only then you can truly love someone. It is the roots that somehow in this high technology age, many of us forget that we do have roots. To be filial to one\u2019s parents is to nourish one\u2019s own roots of being a human being. This is a fundamental principle. This is our most important human duty. If one treats one\u2019s parents badly, one is neglecting one\u2019s roots and forgetting one\u2019s origin.<\/p>\n

When we were young, we learned in elementary school to be filial to our parents and respectful to their elders and teachers. But we often forget it when we grow up. We must rediscover our own roots before it is too late. That is why I write this letter as something to share with current students: Never forget where you come from; never forget your own roots and family relationship is the most precious thing that you have in this life.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nh\u01b0 t\u00f4i th\u01b0\u1eddng y\u00eau c\u1ea7u sinh vi\u00ean \u0111\u00e3 t\u1ed1t nghi\u1ec7p \u0111ang l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c trong c\u00f4ng nghi\u1ec7p chia s\u1ebb kinh nghi\u1ec7m v\u1edbi sinh vi\u00ean hi\u1ec7n th\u1eddi. … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[18,31],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1625","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-loi-khuyen-cho-sinh-vien","category-cac-van-de-khac"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1625","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1625"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1625\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1626,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1625\/revisions\/1626"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1625"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1625"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/science-technology.vn\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1625"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}